Assalamu Alaikum Warahmatullahi Wabarakatuh,
Life hits you, punches you, gives you one under the belt and sooner or later you ask yourself, 'Why Me?' The question is in fact a complaint, a whine to Allah, 'I don't deserve this, what have I done wrong? Just look at the things other people are doing!' You have to lash out against the pain, the feeling of unjustly being hooked, and unfortunately you make Allah the target, the very same Being Who has the sole power of getting you out of it.
But there is a question every Muslim should ask in every circumstance he faces: 'Is my attitude a Muslim's attitude?' and most of the time you will get the reply: no.
As always, the answer to the 'Why Me?' syndrome lies in the Quran and hadith:
“Do people think that they will be left alone because they say: "We believe," and will not be tested. And We indeed tested those who were before them. And Allah will certainly make (it) known (the truth of) those who are true, and will certainly make (it) known (the falsehood of) those who are liars, (although Allah knows all that before putting them to test).” (Al-Ankaboot 29:2-3)
“You shall certainly be tried and tested in your wealth and properties and in your personal selves, and you shall certainly hear much that will grieve you from those who received the Scripture before you (Jews and Christians) and from those who ascribe partners to Allah, but if you persevere patiently, and become Al-Muttaqun (the pious ) then verily, that will be a determining factor in all affairs, and that is from the great matters.” (Al-Imran 3:186)
“Be sure we shall test you with something of fear and hunger, some loss in goods or lives or the fruits (of your toil) … " (Al-Baqarah 2:155)
So you see, all is predestined, we get what we get because Allah wishes to see who we turn to. But what to do in hardships:
1. Remember that this is either a punishment for our sins or a test; in either case keep your cool, turn to Him and do a lot of istaghfar whether you understand ''why' or not.
2. Have the conviction that only He has the power to help you and He will, InshaAllah.
3. Find help in sabr and salah and He says He will be your companion – can you have a greater friend?
4. Study the stories of the prophets and sahabah and see how they coped with their troubles.
5. Ask the friends of Allah. I once desperately called my murabbi about some problems I had and he just said one sentence: 'Fix your eyes on the blessings Allah has given you.' This one sentence was enough to put my heart straight.
6. Make dua to Allah to exchange the blessing of hardship to a blessing of ease and recite the appropriate duas for the situation. InshaAllah you willl come out shining!